Tuesday 21 July 2009


Since my examinations got over, I was faced with a small, seemingly harmless question, “NOW WHAT?” But the question was nothing less than a tiny bullet ripping through my mind and body, with every intention of shattering them. I am now expected to take confident, bold strides into the world, well-equipped as I am with a bunch of papers proclaiming my intelligence and capability of being of some service to society (and also if I can somehow manage to keep myself up on my own two feet, of being served in future as well). They are supposed to be my armour in times of need. It seems that apart from me everybody else is a lot more interested in knowing that what exactly am I going to do with my life – in other words – what exactly will I be doing to make my contribution to the annual GDP, and of course, how much will I be contributing. But shouldn’t that be my concern alone? I can very well manage for myself with an odd job here and an odd job there, or I may suddenly feel very idealistic and start working for free in an NGO, or better still what if I choose to do nothing at all? It’s true that life on earth is not to be wasted. But who decides what “waste” is? I do want to be able to do something for my folks, something to make them proud of me. But will it be a criminal offence if I do not feel that way? Can’t I live just for myself? Or just because a lot has been invested on me, can’t I work just that much so that I repay everything, and detach myself from everyone and everything. I am supposed to be a rational, independent human being. So that I can be free to live life on my own terms. And yet, why am I faced with a question in every turn of my life? After all, which duty is greater - the duty to others or the duty to oneself? And if I consider Myself more rightful of gaining my affections, then will I be tagged “selfish”? What’s wrong in living for oneself? It isn’t easy living a life of contradictions, and here I am constantly in search of that one element which I hope will add a wee bit of meaning to my existence. Questions haunt me, but one of these days I hope to find the proper answers. And until I don’t, I wish myself luck, and dream on…

5 comments:

  1. Nice topic...I likd it..
    Itz really a typicl prblm for evry child,u r nt d only sufferer my dr. I'v also faced smthng 4m my relatvs. Although I'l nt raise my finger 2 our parents or relatvs regarding dis matr,coz itz a structural fault of our present society. Whr kin competitions r goin on in evry fields. 'He/she wil b d winner or he/she wil gt 1st position' itz d main needs of al partents from his/her child. So, don b dprsd, b steady n take dis challenge sportly...mind it,truth wil'b d winner one or another day..

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  2. well nice one bt one thing i would say is be happy never say now what unless ur totally blank... life is not only abt achieving something positive bt all doing things for no return... try to look in a broader way than instead think how much u can do from wat u have done so far in life... think of wat are the things u have never done n try to do them its more fun than the ones u have done already... like we all know moving in one track saturated the huan brain ... to keep it active one must experience or rather try the good n bad stuffs in life.... n when u gain success u set an example in front of others eyes...

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  3. @ Sam - Glad you share my feelings. Proves that I'm not the only one in the soup. :D
    After all, the best that we can do now is to cope with things as they come.


    @ Sayak - Each to his own. Everyone is entitled to his or her own opinion, and i must say your way of thinking isn't wrong either. I like it.

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  4. sayad kuch haad tak tum thik ho aur kuch haad tak galat. We, human beings, are desperately depends on expectations. At the time of birth,father expects a son/daughter. After giving exam, student expects good result,then expect a good job then good life partner, then good child then many more.......
    so ur parents expectations are not different. But there is some way of showing expectations. and we need to do whatever we can to fulfill their EXPECTATIONS.. So my dear, sweet friend don`t worry. live ur life and also take care of ur dad and mom.rest of the world is damn. don`t react at their enquiry. Be what u r.. samjhi.! I m very much confident that u will be a great example(only +ve) for ur family. we need to accept this challenge dear. Accept it and go for it.
    BEST OF LUCK.

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  5. @pramod: You are not wrong either, just wish people were a bit less demanding.. :)

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